My grandmother always made these pizza burgers. For as long as I can remember. They were wrapped in foil when she delivered them or you picked them up from her house. And  they were delicious. I had no idea how or why they tasted like pizza. I only knew they were amazing. So, when I found a recipe book in her house – after she passed – that said “pizza burgers, p. 45” I was ecstatic.

The next day, I headed to the store, cookbook in the car and decided I was going to pick up whatever I needed for the delectable treats. What a fitting first recipe post for her blog, I said to myself. I pulled into the parking spot at the grocery store. I flipped open the cookbook to page 45. ..and it was missing. Page 43 and then nothing. Pages 44 and 45 were completely gone.

I flipped through the entire book quickly, a bit panicked. And noticed that it was torn out of the book and shoved near the end of the recipe book. Of course it was. And there it sat, side by side with a page from pages later in the series, specifically the one that contained a taco pie recipe. Because, you know – my grandmother seemed to be enamored by taco casseroles or pies. It was marked on every single cookbook we located the other day. We’ll try that one out soon, too, don’t worry.

I dashed through the store, grabbed all the ingredients and headed home.

The first ingredient? One entire pound of Velveeta cheese. I had no idea that cheese was ever that religious to people. Don’t get me wrong, I dream of cheese. I think of it often. I love cheese. But I must have located ten cheese cookbooks from years gone past. So it would seem that cheese was a real cornerstone back in the day.

As a warning. this recipe is delicious. This recipe tastes like my childhood. This recipe is my grandmother on a bun. Not really, we buried her – I swear. But it is probably in no way, shape, or form healthy for you. However, she ate it and she lived well into her 80s. So I’m just going to roll with it and enjoy.

I’ll go ahead and post the original recipe right here.

Now I’ll tell you how we made it. Because: allergies to garlic. And how I think Grandma probably made it after my allergies appeared.

Ingredients:

1 lb. Velveeta cheese
1.5 lbs. hamburger
1 small onion
1 tsp. onion salt
1 28 0z. can diced tomatoes (drained)
1 tsp. oregno
hamburger buns
Shredded mozzarella cheese

Directions:

Melt cheese in double boiler (or microwave since we have those in modern day times)

Brown hamburger in skillet, adding onion and onion salt.

Drain meat.

Add drained tomatoes and oregano. Stir.

Add melted cheese to meat mixture.

Let sit for one hour.

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Layer bottom hamburger buns with meat mixture. Cover with shredded cheese.

Bake for 10 minutes.

Remove from oven. Add top bun.

Return to oven for 2 minutes.

Eat until your heart’s content.

Editors notes:

• Grandma never used english muffins. They were always on buns. So we follow suit.
• We replaced the garlic (not that you can really replace it) with an onion when browning the meat.
• One quart of tomatoes is actually 32 oz. But you can usually find 28 oz. easily in a store and we don’t can our own veggies as they probably did then. So this worked just fine.
• The last two minutes isn’t an exact science, it’s just to warm the top bun as well, and it makes everything stick together really well.

If you’re into pictures, I can help. Here’s some pictorials – if you will.

Ah, cheese. Nectar of the gods? Perhaps. This is how you can make a double boiler when you don’t have one, too. Glass bowl on top of steaming pan of water. Just make sure the bowl is above the water. Voila. Problem solved.

Browning the meat. This is always my least favorite part. I hate waiting. But we are using one of grandma’s pans. Which seems to help.

I don’t think there’s extra style points for making your drained tomatoes look like a human heart. But we do eat with our eyes first, right? Sorry.

I just need you to trust me on this one. Because after we stirred the cheese in with the meat mixture? It didn’t look all that appealing. I know. Trust me, it’s worth it.

Waiting the hour before assembling these little guys was the hardest part of this recipe, no joke. It’s easy peasy.

If they look like this when you’re done baking? You’re doing it right.

Adding the top sort of takes away the visual of how amazing these are going to taste. But sometimes the ends justify the means.

I really should have gotten you a better picture of how amazing they look. But it’s hard when you’re eating them with the other hand. Sorry.

These really do, oddly enough, taste like a pizza in a way. And they’re delicious. These pizza burgers have my vote for president. Especially if they’re running against Trump.

Enjoy!